Everyone can be good in bed, if they only want to! To begin with — tune in to love games, then – increase sexual desire, and … orgasm will not keep you waiting! All about sex, or 9 ways to tune in to sex.
Invite your partner on a date
At a young age, when the hormone content in the blood is just off the scale, any situation seems romantic, whether it’s a bench on the beach or a hotel room with an ocean view. The older we get, the more comfort we need. Therefore, many lovers prefer to have sex at home, in the most comfortable conditions for themselves. Over time, love caresses on the marital bed become boring, and boredom confidently enters life.
What to do?
Change the situation, invite your partner on a date! If you have feelings towards your partner and they are mutual, it will not be difficult to ignite the flame of passion from a spark. It is enough to plan relaxing activities — a trip to the cinema or dinner at a restaurant, and only then enjoy the proximity. A change of scenery and a full rest will certainly do their job. And in the future, you can purposefully plan “sexual marathons”.
Scientists have calculated that men think about sex or what is associated with it – on average every 8 minutes.
Be careful with alcoholic beverages
Cozy cafe, live music, with you at the table the man of your dreams… What could be better than pleasant conversations and sweet compliments, backed up by the exquisite taste of good champagne or wine. And, nevertheless, aesculapians do not recommend leaning on alcohol, since it is a kind of depressant. It is worth exceeding the permissible dosage, and instead of a “playful mood” you will get the exact opposite result. Sexual attraction will fade away and the only desire will be to find yourself “in the arms of Morpheus.”
What to do?
Control the amount you drink. 1-2 glasses of wine are enough to completely relax and increase self-confidence. Leaving a sparkling drink in a bottle, remember that more pleasant things are waiting for you.
Try natural aphrodisiacs
And although there is no scientific reason to say that some products increase libido, many people successfully use them to achieve what they want. If you want to increase the intensity of passions, try popular aphrodisiacs – oysters, chocolate, watermelon, cauliflower, rye bread, celery or sweet potatoes.
What to do?
Do not think that a cauliflower eaten before a date will affect you like Viagra. Natural aphrodisiacs have low effectiveness. If you want them to work well, choose for yourself those that cause sexual attraction for you personally. If eating oysters seems to you a piquant and exciting activity, it can really help you.
Chocolate cream, whipped cream and ice cream are the three favorite products of 30% of women. They all dream of these products being licked off their bodies.
Check the hormonal background
Hormones have a direct impact on all processes occurring in the body. Among other things, they regulate sexual desire. If you do not want to have sex with a partner for no apparent reason, consult a doctor.
What to do?
By making an appointment with a specialized specialist, and voicing the problem, you can eliminate it in a short time. An endocrinologist will study the hormonal background and tell you how to return the fading passion. You may have to drink special drugs or, on the contrary, cancel the drugs that reduce sexual desire.
Learn how to relieve stress
Threes in a semester with a beloved child, difficulties at work and a quarrel with neighbors in the country can affect your well-being and desire much more than you think. It is quite difficult to resist the vicissitudes of life, but everyone can learn not to take them to heart, and relieve stress in time.
What to do?
First of all, remember that any stress provokes increased production of the hormone cortisol in the blood. The “stress hormone” has a characteristic side effect — it reduces libido. So that a stressful situation does not upset your plans and does not deprive you of the right to love joys, determine for yourself those activities that quickly relieve tension and improve your mood. For example, a walk in the fresh air, reading romance novels, yoga classes or cooking a festive dinner. There are many good options!
In the recent past, men were the initiators of sex in 75% of cases. Now the mores have changed! Almost 40% of meetings end with sexual games initiated by women.
If you want to keep an active intimate life until old age, by all means quit smoking. Firstly, this addiction is harmful to health, and in fact it is an important condition for sexual attraction. Secondly, the substances contained in cigarette smoke constrict blood vessels, thereby reducing blood flow to the genitals. But good blood circulation is necessary for an erection!
What to do?
Answer yourself honestly to the question — are you ready to give up the addiction and get a well-deserved prize – improved health, increased sexual desire and more enjoyment? If yes, get down to business! Reduce the number of cigarettes smoked per day and meet the new day with a greeting to the sun, not a new cigarette.
Corny?! Perhaps! But it is regular physical activity that improves blood supply, guaranteeing blood flow to the genitals, increases human endurance and sexual desire in general. By exercising regularly, you will see that you have become more active in bed, your body perceives caresses and gentle touches more keenly, and you yourself are more flexible and can take those poses that were previously unattainable for you.
What to do?
Choose a sport that you like. Classes for pleasure will give more results and will bring not only the joy of achieving goals, but also love victories.
Most lovers use 2-5 positions during intimacy, the most common of which are the missionary position and the woman on top. And only 5 percent of lovers go further — for them, 20 positions is not the limit!
Try a massage
If you are worried and tense, it is certainly more difficult for a loved one to excite you, libido naturally decreases. But still – there is a good way guaranteed to relax and then have fun. Ask your partner to give you a light massage, gradually developing into sensual caresses and exploring the secret corners of your body.
What to do?
Try to detach yourself from current affairs, and tune in to a real SPA ritual. Turn on soothing music, prepare a jar of massage oil or cream, and plunge into the world of pleasure! The sliding movements of the fingers of a loved one will find “points of contact” with your libido, and bring you to orgasm.
Add novelty notes to the intimacy
Routine is the main enemy of sexual attraction. In order not to be defeated by her, constantly try something new in bed. It is not necessary to buy sex toys, practice role-playing games or do something similar. Start with the simplest – a frank story about your desires.
What to do?
During foreplay, tell your partner about how you see perfect sex. What touches excite you, what turns you on, what words caress your ears. Do not be afraid to fantasize, describe everything vividly and without a gram of embarrassment. Guide your partner’s hands and caress yourself.
Orgasm has a beneficial effect on the cardiovascular system, improves the overall tone of the body, increases the elasticity and elasticity of the skin, and in women – in addition, makes menstruation less painful.
Every patient who comes to me with a sexual problem confirms a well-known fact — all sex is in our head. This also applies to the extinction of libido. The causes of this symptom are mostly located, so to speak, in the “psychological register”.
These may include her intrapersonal problems (low self-esteem, strong dependence on a partner, inability to relax, jealousy, etc.) and relationship problems with a partner (frequent quarrels, short foreplay, his unwillingness to take into account her wishes, infidelity, etc.). It is impossible not to take into account among the reasons and features of a woman’s sexual constitution. Ie, for a certain part of women, lack of attraction is practically the norm.
Often, a decrease in sexual desire is an indicator (symptom) of a dysfunctional relationship in a couple or masked depression. If this condition lasts for more than 2 months, then it is clearly necessary to contact a specialist here. Short-term lack of libido can occur periodically in 50% of women. In this case, rest or, conversely, physical activity will already do their job. I do not undertake to consider now hormonal or physical reasons for a decrease in sexual desire.
Moreover, these problems, clinging to one another, can create a vicious circle. She understands that her refusal to her husband (boyfriend) can also increase the psychological distance between them. Here she is additionally “overwhelmed” by guilt, fear, uncertainty – up to depression. Although depression itself, even minor, can also cause unwillingness to have sex, however, as well as anxiety.
Separately, I want to say about the combination of alibidemia (decreased sexual desire) and anorgasmia (lack of orgasm), i.e. the lack of sexual desire can be both a consequence and a cause of anorgasmia.
Appeal to women: if a partner is dear to you, then show him this, in this difficult period, in ways that are available to you.
Appeal to men: remember the tenderness and subtlety of the origin of the phenomenon of female attraction! You can, by your emotional closeness with your partner, both strengthen it and influence it negatively.
Appeal to couples: discuss everything, pronounce, do not shut up, so as not to accumulate and “store” suppressed emotions that can lead to cooling. Don’t let the lack of attraction ruin your relationship! It’s curable!